the reason for Soma

[Adding a note here on Nov 22, 2023, years later, to clarify this blog post— this website, when it was first incubated years ago used to go by the name SomaOne— and so i provided, “the reason for Soma. I felt it should still exist here, even though the name has changed… if anyone happens to find it anyway. Enjoy.]

I can't remember if it was on my way there or on my way back, but i was seeking. 

seeking for escape, for safety in the unknown, 'cause i knew no safety in the heart i'd called familiar. 

searching for healing. (closure, courage, and some type of understanding, or better, laying to rest this hunger for an explanation of the pain i was feeling). 

 

I had to trust in the process. and being here, it helped, as trust became like my weapon of love, and my guide. In this place I'd dreamt about for so long, though we all knew I was foreign to. 

it wasn't an option for fear to hold my movements here. 

and so trust came. 

I was on an overnight bus. Returning to Mumbai from Goa. I had gone alone. 

The time turned slowly, as we rolled past greyed dirt and dimmed lights, until it reached my birthday, May 5— and I read. 

and it spoke to me. 

before resting my eyes against the uneasy rumbling and dramatic movements of the buses efforts- sometimes shakes so full of motion nearly bringing me to join the discarded sandals, swimming on the ground, free from their owners (some relief for now)- I found it. 

I read each word, eagerly, to hold myself to myself and to a self that I'd forgotten, and now, maybe, so far away from home, I'd have the space to relieve.

As darkness became a dim and gentle light, I looked at the time, embracing my solitude on this day I came into the world 24 years ago. I embraced the silence and the secret messages whispered all around me. Letting go of this desire for my life to be validated by the efforts of others, 

 and I found intoxication— 

in those words, in that space, and in the precarious swaying of our travels.  It felt like the heart behind my journey had been reached. 

"Soma," the words on the page read, and I pulled myself deeper, to let my mind understand what I already knew. 

SOMA: direct translation from Sanskrit to English: MOON

Greek translation BODY + in Science (Biology) Soma is: the cell body in the neuron

Soma courses through all (living) things 

It is also a Hindu deity and a plant/ ritual drink (intoxicating) 

(Soma) Hindu Deity: -inspiration to those who seek (it)

  • God of poets

  • God of the moon

  • Dwelling place of venerated dead

  • Divine cure for evil

*(he rarely is seen as a full grown human)

(Soma) Ritual Drink: -Ambrosia of the Gods 

  • "Due to this influence that they could rise above obstacles to achieve their goals"

  • Helped warriors overcome fears in battle

  • Inspired creation

  • Bridge between mortal world and the Gods

  • (In mortals) brought hallucination and ecstasy

Imbibing Moon from intoxication 

Embracing illogical 

Melting down logic and resistance 

Doing things you would otherwise not do

(this blessing of a message/intention/word I discovered upon the pages of, "Of Mystics & Mistakes," The journey from confusion to clarity, from error to enlightenment, from self-deception to self-discovery, by Sadhguru)

*My commitment is to share the intention and power of this “Soma”; allowing it to take over me and creating a space where others feel the courage to be taken over by this intoxication (Life) as well— because, for far too long, I have let fear stunt my movements, rather than moving WITH the fear. And, that is ok. We can not allow our regret, of actions not made, to keep us from acting Now. We can always start from where We Are. 

Take good care, my friends, and continue seeking, with compassion and resilience.

You are That. 

Eva-Milan ZsigaComment